Go Figure
I am indulging in a bit of self analysis, I mean, what is it about numbers and me? I really can't figure it out. (sorry, bad pun)
As long as I can remember, I have had issues with numbers, you know, math, 'arithmetic' as it used to be called. Some folks are afraid of snakes or bugs or heights...not me. The biggest cockroach in the world doesn't even make me quiver. I don't mind snakes a bit, tight spaces, high places...not a problem, but give me two or more digits and I am shaking in my boots. Do I have a 'number' phobia?
It seems, as I look back and try to remember, that this has always been an issue for me. Hiding in the cloak closet as a very young child waiting for the math portion of class to finish and the teacher never noticing is one memory. My grandfather used to drill me on my multiplication tables which by the way, I never managed to memorize and would dread. I can remember most peoples names that I meet but never their phone numbers, even old friends that I talk to frequently. I can't count although I have worked in credit departments, as a cashier, and do my own bookkeeping (how I manage is always questionable.) And it is not just math that makes me sweat...dates, times, anything, anything to do with numbers makes me nervous because I know I have dyslexic tendencies with numbers. I will get 'em mixed up more often than not.
And it is not as if I am not careful, very careful when numbers are necessary. I recently sent out postcards to several hundred of my customers on my mailing list with the upcoming shows, times and dates. I create the template for my postcards, go and print them myself, hand address them (my printer sucks, sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't) and have that satisfied feeling that I've done all I can to insure a successful turnout to the shows. Then (EEK!!!!) I discover that I put the wrong dates...for the next show!!! There it is, in print...the wrong days, the wrong weekend. This is a quandary...do I go to La Union and sit by the winery and apologise to all that turn out on the wrong day for my show? Explain that I have issues with numbers? Hah! I can't send out correction postcards. Sheesh! At least, I called my friends (I looked the numbers up) and let them know the right dates and damn if some of them were planning on coming on the wrong date that I sent them... How in the heck did I get it wrong...even though I thought I checked everything carefully...?
They (the ubiquitous 'they') say that part of dealing with a problem is knowing what the problem is. I know I have this problem with numbers so I try and be very careful when I HAVE to use them. Although, more often than not my checkbook never balances, I have to do my taxes over and over, etc. And it's not as if I think I am stupid...I have a pretty good opinion of my capabilities, my brain function. String theories in physics fascinate me, cellular biology is something I enjoy reading about, Einstein's theories are fairly well understood and 'ubiquitous' is a word I use in a sentence but don't ask me what 9 times 8 equals...I'd have to calculate it and even then, I may get it wrong.
Now for those of you that have no issues with numbers, this may all seem a bit silly, a fear of numbers but think about how you feel about snakes or bugs or whatever it is that you have irrational fears about. It just is. Trying to analyze myself and the 'problem' I have experimented with several reasons why this may be. It is known that the right side of our brains has to do with creativity, communications, and is more subjective and the left side is analytical, logical and that's where we use numbers. Obviously, I am more right sided than left but is that the reason for my unreason? I am still working on it...until then, your indulgence is required if I sent you the wrong date, told you the wrong time and don't ask me to 'go figure' for you.
As long as I can remember, I have had issues with numbers, you know, math, 'arithmetic' as it used to be called. Some folks are afraid of snakes or bugs or heights...not me. The biggest cockroach in the world doesn't even make me quiver. I don't mind snakes a bit, tight spaces, high places...not a problem, but give me two or more digits and I am shaking in my boots. Do I have a 'number' phobia?
It seems, as I look back and try to remember, that this has always been an issue for me. Hiding in the cloak closet as a very young child waiting for the math portion of class to finish and the teacher never noticing is one memory. My grandfather used to drill me on my multiplication tables which by the way, I never managed to memorize and would dread. I can remember most peoples names that I meet but never their phone numbers, even old friends that I talk to frequently. I can't count although I have worked in credit departments, as a cashier, and do my own bookkeeping (how I manage is always questionable.) And it is not just math that makes me sweat...dates, times, anything, anything to do with numbers makes me nervous because I know I have dyslexic tendencies with numbers. I will get 'em mixed up more often than not.
And it is not as if I am not careful, very careful when numbers are necessary. I recently sent out postcards to several hundred of my customers on my mailing list with the upcoming shows, times and dates. I create the template for my postcards, go and print them myself, hand address them (my printer sucks, sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't) and have that satisfied feeling that I've done all I can to insure a successful turnout to the shows. Then (EEK!!!!) I discover that I put the wrong dates...for the next show!!! There it is, in print...the wrong days, the wrong weekend. This is a quandary...do I go to La Union and sit by the winery and apologise to all that turn out on the wrong day for my show? Explain that I have issues with numbers? Hah! I can't send out correction postcards. Sheesh! At least, I called my friends (I looked the numbers up) and let them know the right dates and damn if some of them were planning on coming on the wrong date that I sent them... How in the heck did I get it wrong...even though I thought I checked everything carefully...?
They (the ubiquitous 'they') say that part of dealing with a problem is knowing what the problem is. I know I have this problem with numbers so I try and be very careful when I HAVE to use them. Although, more often than not my checkbook never balances, I have to do my taxes over and over, etc. And it's not as if I think I am stupid...I have a pretty good opinion of my capabilities, my brain function. String theories in physics fascinate me, cellular biology is something I enjoy reading about, Einstein's theories are fairly well understood and 'ubiquitous' is a word I use in a sentence but don't ask me what 9 times 8 equals...I'd have to calculate it and even then, I may get it wrong.
Now for those of you that have no issues with numbers, this may all seem a bit silly, a fear of numbers but think about how you feel about snakes or bugs or whatever it is that you have irrational fears about. It just is. Trying to analyze myself and the 'problem' I have experimented with several reasons why this may be. It is known that the right side of our brains has to do with creativity, communications, and is more subjective and the left side is analytical, logical and that's where we use numbers. Obviously, I am more right sided than left but is that the reason for my unreason? I am still working on it...until then, your indulgence is required if I sent you the wrong date, told you the wrong time and don't ask me to 'go figure' for you.
posted by SooZen | 3:19 AM
3 Comments:
The only way to conquer this is to get a number buddy. If it's someone who also hates figures and mixes em up in bizarre and unique fashion, so much the better. One can look out for the other. It's easier when it's not just up to me. I love checking my dyscalculic friend. Just as i love being her witness when she puts something important in a certain spot. She announces: You're my witness, and sure enough, her announcement is enough to help highlight her memory.
Working together makes everything less tense. You go over all the details, checking each other and then you proceed with the typed version.
Or, do it by e-mail. Pick a buddy, any buddy and leave yourself enough time for them to read your proof and check it.
The more deliberate process should take the edge off the issue (unmentionable)itself.
helpful hints from a seeker of helpful hints.
p.s. i can handle written numbers if i have a clean table and time, but if someone starts running off sums and multiplications out loud, i prefer to stick my head in a sewer.
j
Numbers! EEEEEEKKKK!!!!
Well, I used to feel that way. I don't know if it was because we moved 3 times the year I was in 3rd grade or not, but I never could learn my times tables either. I still don't know my 7s, 8s and 9s. This was a bitch since I'm the 5th in a line of kids that went through school labeled as "gifted" by teachers of math. When my 10th grade teacher informed me, I was like my siblings I just groaned to myself.
Alas, handling the concepts was easy, but I never could get the mechanics straight. One teacher told me I was just too impatient to do the simple math right. (I couldn't add 7 + 8 and get 15). I left the high levels of math as soon as I could.
Years passed and I wound up in a job which was math based. Much to my utter surprise I really liked the mathematical functions I had to perform every day. Cripes... it was simply that all those little minor things (like adding, multiplying, and dividing) were now handled by a spreaadsheet or calculator. Then I wished I had gone on to calculus and the other stuff of which I had been scared.
I think you need not worry too much. I agree with Judih, get a proofreading buddy for the numbers. I have to have someone help me out with text. I read so fast, I can never see typos. I'm a terrible proof reader of words, but can read columns of numbers and type them usually perfectly. How weird!
And fear, I find myself terrified of such weird stuff, like getting fried by lightening while sleeping in my bed at night. I think I'll swap my fear for yours, OK?
Glad to see I am not alone! Hah!
judih, a number buddy sounds good... Course, no one can check my dates for me when I do the postcards, I have to rely on myself but next time...care will be taken.
Annie...my dear friend Leti got struck by lightning in her house so who's to say that is unreasonable?
Thanks for replies and the advice friends!
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